Today has been... good. It's wierd. It's been a while since I've had a truly good day. Here are the reasons it was a good day:

1) spare first block - got to read my book
2) understood math
3) ok well english sucked but that's per usual
4) social studies... jeff, ravi and luke :)
5) Mrs.Baldwin's 'you look grown up comment'
6) picking up photos :) :)
7) the nicest email ever from Bobby
8) mitten sisters (oh, and ok)
9) CHICAGO with my mum, Haley, her mum and grandma
10) switching shifts with Katie
11) putting up all my playbills and more stuff on my doors
12) actually posting on my blog for once
13) plans to go over to Star and Eric's

I'm gonna stop there, lucky thirteen. I mean sure, my day wasn't all sunshine and roses but right now I am focusing on happier thoughts. Not on sad stuff... no sad stuff today. I'll save that for another day. Now I am going to get a drink and then go to bed. Goodnight world. Sleep tight and dream of faeries.

My mouth in asleep from the dentist and it hurts :( I don't want to go back to school tomorrow. Someone pointed out to me we only have three semesters left of high school. A fairly frightening thought actually. But now I'm afraid I shall have to stop posting as my computer is making wierd noises. Goodbye cyberspace.

My day was made today when my friend said this to me:

"i dunno, you're just the kind of person that makes other ppl feel like.... like they mean something, like whatever happens in the world, no matter how crazy it is, things will be okay."

I think that it was the nicest thing anybody has ever said to me, in my whle life. If I can make other people matter, than I must matter. And then life is kind of worth it again...

I'm so tired of being alone. I just want someone to be able to talk to, who'll care. Someone I know cares about me. I just want someone special. To laugh and joke with. Someone I can cry with. I'm scared of the future because I see myself going through my life alone. And nothing anyone tells me can convince me otherwise. I see myself in 5 years, 10 years, 20 years... always alone. Perpetually single. And I'm lonely. I'm scared and lonely and tired of feeling this way. People keep telling me that there's someone out there for me and I just don't believe it anymore. I can't imagine that God would want us to spend our lives alone but maybe I'm wrong. *sob* I'm so scared...

Love is an unexpected gift.
It is saying goodbye, and being able to say hello again.
It is the first star on a clear night, and the smell after rain.
It is standing next to a friend in perfect, quiet harmony.

It's been quite a while since I last posted. I've been busy being sick. It's been fun, really :S But today I was feeling especially low so here is my cry.

Have you ever met someone and totally connected with them, right away? I have a few times. This one, he was really great. Sweet, funny, kinda cute, really honest and pure. The kind of fun I miss having around me. We had a really great time. I only saw hime twice and we've talked since then but... I don't think he got what he meant to me. He opened my eyes to the way life could be, the way I could be. And yet, I felt that if I liked him I would be like all those silly annoying girls you told me about. How everyone fell in love with him. I do love him. Not the romantic-under-the-stars-love, but the genuine-I-wish-I-could-be-with-you-love. The kindred-spirit-love. He told me that I was kindred. Or something along those lines. And I really felt it when I was there but then I left and now I'm here and I feel... forgotten. Alone. Seperate. Maybe that's just me. Maybe I'm being melodramatic. But I do miss him. And I wish he knew....

Euro English


The European Union commissioners have announced that agreement has been reached to adopt English as the preferred language for European communications, rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five-year phased plan for what will be known as Euro-English (Euro for short).

In the first year, "s" will be used instead of the soft "c". Sertainly, sivil servants will resieve this news with joy. Also, the hard "c" will be replaced with "k". Not only will this klear up konfusion, but typewriters kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced by "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20 per sent shorter. In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of silent "e"s in the languag is disgrasful, and they would go. By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" by "z" and "w" by "v".

During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou", and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst place

	You are Kermit! Though you're technically the star, you're pretty mellow and don't mind letting others share the spotlight. You are also something of a dreamer.
Take the What Muppet Are You? Quiz!

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A new name for the blog, yay! I guess I just needed something to change. And since life obviously wasnt going to, I had to do it in the only way possible. Besides, I always thought that if I were to be a crayon, I would like to be the white one because no one would ever use me :) Except those strange people who feel the need to colour a white cloud on a white piece of paper, white *you know who you are* In other news, I passed the written part of my driver's ed and start the in-car on Thursday. I have to admit, I'm really nervous but also quite excited. AGH!! I am going to kill this new keyboard. I can't type anymore. I'm sorry all you devoted (ha) listeners out there in cyberland, I must end this entry before I smash the keyboard. I bid thee good night. *wanders off to bed muttering nasty things about straight keyboards under her breath*

Was randomly looking through my archives and I found these posts and felt the need to re-post them. I'm not entirely sure why I needed to, but something inside me was telling me to so here they are:

The Meaning of Shattered Glass Slipper
Have you ever stopped and wondered what would have happened to Cinderella if her shoe hadn't fallen off that night? Or if the shoe had broken? Well I have and this is what I figure. Shattered glass slipper, it means that you lost your fairytale ending. Your slipper shattered as you were running down the stairs before the Prince (or Princess depending on who you are) could catch you. Therefore they had nothing to search for you with and gave up and married someone else and had a different, but equally good, happily ever after. A shattered glass slipper is just the loss of a dream or a hope or a love. It's that feeling inside that says, "You screwed up... You do know that right? And you realize that you're never going to be able to fix that, right? And that happily ever after isn't ever going to happen for you, right?" It isn't always a sad thing, sometimes it is just a knowledge. So for those of you who actually care enough to read this and wondered what it meant, that is its meaning.


Why I lay on the floor and stare up
People have asked me so many times why I just lay in the middle of a floor and stare up. For hours at a time. They don't understand and I could never really give them the answer. But this is it: People in this day and age spend entirely too much time looking down. We watch every step we take so as to ensure that we don't make a wrong step or take a wrong turn, or trip and fall (metaphorically speaking that is). Nobody looks up anymore. We are content just to let the world slip by, slide through our fingers without seeing it pass. Luckily I realized one day, that if you lay down and look up, you see all the up that you have been missing, and... how can you fall if you're lying on your back?

Oh my tummy hurts from too much junk food. But, all in all, this was the best New Year's Eve EVER. 6 Mary-Kate and Ashley movies, a case of Gingerale, 3 bags of chips and a bottle of orange pop and one of Coke, later, everyone has gone home and everything has been tidy-ed up.

I seem to be doing better lately. I miss everyone from the show terribly, but I feel a little more alive than I did right after close. The funny thing is that I still don't know whether or not I want to audition for Secret Garden. I mean I really would like to do another show but it's just so much. And I really want to be in Babies in the Barracks. Desksions, desksions. :)

Anyways I'm off to the Wake for fun and caffeine.

Msgs for friends:
Bee: Yay for Mary-Kate and Ashley but I think I've gotten my fill now. No more till next year :)
Haley: All my love and a tiny bit more. Please call me tommorow or soonish.