TO EVERYONE WHO READS THIS BLOG:
It has become apparent to me that nobody reads the disclaimer (located beneath the counter) so I have decided to copy this bit and put it here. Please read.
Personal relationships and privacy
Do not assume that you know everything there is to know about a writer simply because you read their weblog on a regular basis. Any judgements you make will be based on the information they have provided you about themselves, which is probably vague, incomplete or embellished. Whatever opinion you form on them as people, or their life as a whole, is probably best kept to yourself. Remember, you are the reader. An obvious exception to this would be if someone were asking for advice or opinions.
Never contact the writer for more details on events or personal information than what they have already provided on the site. Chances are if the information you seek isn't readily available, they have found it too personal or innapropriate to share. If you are close to the person they will eventually tell you privately, so intrusive questions are not necessary, just leave it alone. If you are meant to know, you will.
If you have a real life relationship with the writer, remember that communication is very important. View weblogs as online journals, no less sacred than a diary hidden between the mattresses. First of all let them know that you read their site, especially if they did not tell you personally.
If they do not want you reading it, or suddenly stop posting entries, ask them why and if necessary, stop going to the site. It is important that as a friend, relative, co-worker or whatever you may be to the writer, that your presence at their weblog not impede their ability to express themselves. Remember this is their outlet. They may not want you to read certain things they might write about you or others you care about, in order to spare your feelings, avoid drama or maintain their privacy. You should respect this and immediately stop going to the site, and never relay any information you gather at their site to others who might use it against them.
If someone writes about you and you don't appreciate it, approach them about it. Try to remain calm and polite. Explain that you are entitled to your privacy as well. There are many compromises that can be reached from using vague nicknames to protect your anonymity, or not mentioning you at all. If you are upset because they are writing negative things about you, be reasonable, try to see if there is a way to resolve the issues and mend your relationship with the writer. If that doesn't seem to be possible, stop going to the website. They will eventually get bored and move on.
Ex-friends, lovers and estranged family members who have been cut out of the writer's life should refrain from reading their journal. If the relationship has ended, there is no reason you should get daily updates on the person's life. If you simply can't help yourself, do it quietly, and never repeat what you read or use it to hurt the writer.
That said, I have no problem with my friends reading my blog but there is one condition, under no circumstances are you to flip out at me about the contents of an entry. The thing is that this is my place and I refuse to feel that I have to edit it because you don't like something I say. If I say something about you that don't appreciate, sorry, but sometimes I have to write because it keeps me from thinking or doing stupid things. And if that keeps me sane, and around for a little bit longer, I'm willing to risk hurting a few feelings. Remember, you chose to come here and read this, and everyone has a breaking point. I'm not good at the whole "confront"ing thing, so this my escape. This is my safe-spot. And in a world that rarely has safe spots, don't begrudge me mine. So if you have a problem, talk to me in person or leave a guestbook entry as a private entry. Just because you are mad, doesn't mean the whole world needs to know. That is all I have to say today, except for Haley, we need to talk.
It has become apparent to me that nobody reads the disclaimer (located beneath the counter) so I have decided to copy this bit and put it here. Please read.
Personal relationships and privacy
Do not assume that you know everything there is to know about a writer simply because you read their weblog on a regular basis. Any judgements you make will be based on the information they have provided you about themselves, which is probably vague, incomplete or embellished. Whatever opinion you form on them as people, or their life as a whole, is probably best kept to yourself. Remember, you are the reader. An obvious exception to this would be if someone were asking for advice or opinions.
Never contact the writer for more details on events or personal information than what they have already provided on the site. Chances are if the information you seek isn't readily available, they have found it too personal or innapropriate to share. If you are close to the person they will eventually tell you privately, so intrusive questions are not necessary, just leave it alone. If you are meant to know, you will.
If you have a real life relationship with the writer, remember that communication is very important. View weblogs as online journals, no less sacred than a diary hidden between the mattresses. First of all let them know that you read their site, especially if they did not tell you personally.
If they do not want you reading it, or suddenly stop posting entries, ask them why and if necessary, stop going to the site. It is important that as a friend, relative, co-worker or whatever you may be to the writer, that your presence at their weblog not impede their ability to express themselves. Remember this is their outlet. They may not want you to read certain things they might write about you or others you care about, in order to spare your feelings, avoid drama or maintain their privacy. You should respect this and immediately stop going to the site, and never relay any information you gather at their site to others who might use it against them.
If someone writes about you and you don't appreciate it, approach them about it. Try to remain calm and polite. Explain that you are entitled to your privacy as well. There are many compromises that can be reached from using vague nicknames to protect your anonymity, or not mentioning you at all. If you are upset because they are writing negative things about you, be reasonable, try to see if there is a way to resolve the issues and mend your relationship with the writer. If that doesn't seem to be possible, stop going to the website. They will eventually get bored and move on.
Ex-friends, lovers and estranged family members who have been cut out of the writer's life should refrain from reading their journal. If the relationship has ended, there is no reason you should get daily updates on the person's life. If you simply can't help yourself, do it quietly, and never repeat what you read or use it to hurt the writer.
That said, I have no problem with my friends reading my blog but there is one condition, under no circumstances are you to flip out at me about the contents of an entry. The thing is that this is my place and I refuse to feel that I have to edit it because you don't like something I say. If I say something about you that don't appreciate, sorry, but sometimes I have to write because it keeps me from thinking or doing stupid things. And if that keeps me sane, and around for a little bit longer, I'm willing to risk hurting a few feelings. Remember, you chose to come here and read this, and everyone has a breaking point. I'm not good at the whole "confront"ing thing, so this my escape. This is my safe-spot. And in a world that rarely has safe spots, don't begrudge me mine. So if you have a problem, talk to me in person or leave a guestbook entry as a private entry. Just because you are mad, doesn't mean the whole world needs to know. That is all I have to say today, except for Haley, we need to talk.
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